Monday, January 14, 2013

Race Cars and Boobs...

I know, I know...I've been a bad blogger the past month. Somehow complaining about my kids seemed wrong after the Newtown shooting...But I'm back in action. I'm sure you have really missed out on the Evans' Family adventures. Well to get you up to date, like you, we have been busy spending time with our family and friends...I took some time off work and spent much quality time with my boys. I also  made some great New Years Resolutions that I have already broken! I hope you are doing a better job; no doubt you are dieting and eating right. Good for you; I decided to go on a 3 day wine bender and eat as much chocolate as I could get my hands on...twice!

Don't even act like you don't feel this way
But during my sabbatical from blogging I learned that I am raising at least one and quite likely two sexist males. I'm not sure how this is even possible, with so many positive, strong female role models surrounding them on a daily basis. Yet the more time I spend with Jackson I learn that he has basically already made up his mind on most subjects. And the topic of females (Guwirls, as he calls us) is no exception. Due to the fact that we are a medical family, human anatomy is a topic that we enjoy discussing without limitations. We call body parts by their real names and we have taught Jackson that boys pee out of their penis and girls pee out of their butts. And he is all to aware that girls have boobs...
One day Blake was babbling away and I turned to Jackson and said, "What do you think Blake is saying?" To which Jackson replied, "Oh he's just telling me a story." I just had to know more..."What's the story about?"....wait for it..."He's talking about race cars and boobs." I was confused. Did he just say race cars and boobs?! First, how do these two things even go together? And second, is my 8 month old really already discussing these two things? So Luke swoops in to clarify the topic of Blake's story, "Jackson did you say race cars that zoom?". "NO DAD! Race cars and Boobs. You know, BOOBS!" He just couldn't let it go, "Well Jackson, do you have boobs?" "No I don't have boobs. Blake, no boobs. Daddy, no boobs." Then he points my way, no more words were exchanged.
Race cars and Boobs...This has become the theme of my life.
Jackson will pick up one of my bras and toss it to me saying, "Put on your boobs".  I had several bras out on my bed, he asked me "Really mom, how many boobs do you have?"
Jackson also likes to tell the cat to shake his hips. He will sneak up on the cat from behind and start shaking the cat, singing "Shake your hips". So naturally one day he tells me to shake my boobs. Luke had to leave the room he was laughing so hard. I just stood stunned and then I told him to shake his boobs. (I'm pretty sure that any child psychologist would tell you this is not therapeutic communication but it was all I had at that moment.) He told me that he was a boy and he did not have boobs.

I guess Jackson is truly a lost cause, I should really have seen this coming when he asked for a robe to wear because he gets cold after his bath...
Watch out Hugh Hefner
Don't all 2 year olds sit on the counter while they brush their teeth
Perhaps part of the problem is that neither of them ever seems to have pants on. I take thousands of pictures and as I look through them I notice that no one EVER has pants on...I swear I put pants on them, but boom by mid morning its like a pants free fiesta!
no pants on the counter

no pants at Auntie Amanda's house

Trying to pack...I have no idea what is happening...but I apparently have some boobs on the floor

pants free while playing the saxophone
Pantsless wrestling

Luke was going to the pool store and Jackson really wanted to go with him. Jackson was wearing a t shirt and movie Cars underwear. So he naturally put on his shoes to ready himself for this outing.

And then there is the shirt less painting that goes on...

No shoes, no problems
Blake is my only hope, I'm not sure I believe Jackson's version of Blake's story. I will have to wait until he actually speaks to know where he stands on the subject of race cars and boobs.
He's well on his way to being a sexist in his race car
For now I plan to teach him nothing about human anatomy and teach him false/baby-like names for all his body parts. Currently all he cares about is standing up at the play table and knocking off all Jackson's perfectly aligned cars.
quickly stealing some of Jackson's stuff

rearranging cars!

Ok well now you know that you should at all costs keep your sweet little girls as far away from our house as possible...Here are some Peaks and Pits. I only hope you are having more peaks than pits.

A few peaks....
A boy on the move
some together time
naptime photos

fun times in the car
Fewer pits....
Jackson teaching Blake to eat cat food
Blake learning about the perils of jail

Diego, exhausted after facebooking for hours

I hope you all are doing a better job parenting your boys....have a wonderful week!

1 comment:

  1. I have to stop reading your blogs while in bed with my sleeping husband because me trying to stifle my laughter just results in making the bed shake! Cheers to race cars and boobs and to waiting another year for kids ;-) lol